“hope”- Poem by Maria Llantada

I touch their skin.


They mean nothing to me.

Just men to soothe my mind,

The way nicotine softens angst.

Trying to fuck something back alive.

Close enough to kiss

Yet far away enough to not be killed.


What was I to him?

“The most precious” thing he said,

Yet left to rot

While in the most delicate state.


Beautiful enough to caress,

Yet too human.

Too human to love til dawn.

Too many scars.

Too many flaws.


Not worthy enough to watch the sunrise with.


It’s just me and the sun,

Alone,

Wondering why people don’t stay long enough to witness the beauty of glimpsing light.


A grave for a new life,

That never saw the beauty of

The peeking sun.

That’s tragedy.

Never having eyes to enjoy

The rays of light.


What’s wrong with me? I ask.

His ghost tugs at my heart, asking why he didn’t stay.


I sit here, watching the sun rise,


Basking in its love.


Once too torched to feel the warmth of the hearth and not shudder from fear of being burned again.


I throw hope in the air,

Wondering if it’ll knock me out.

Yet even if it does,

I’ll still rise.


We always do.

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